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Traveling for a Cuddle, or More, at European Sex Parties
13.11.2024 - 11:01 / nytimes.com
Olivia and her husband were on a romantic getaway. The couple had been finding it hard to “do anything spicy at home at all,” she said, what with their two teenage children around and the dirty laundry piling up. Escaping for a weekend in Venice at the end of the city’s annual carnival, in February, seemed like the perfect way to reconnect. But instead of a gondola ride or a canal-side dinner, their itinerary revolved around a masquerade ball and, possibly, sex with strangers.
Their faces hidden behind intricately decorated masks, the couple made their way to a private Venetian palazzo. Around 150 guests sipped champagne and ate oysters while listening to a classical pianist and string quartet, while downstairs a “dungeon master” demonstrated spanking and other basic B.D.S.M. techniques. At 10 p.m., guests were invited to remove their masks — the playrooms (spaces reserved for consensual sexual encounters) were now open.
“I mean, that was the best way to see Venice,” said Olivia, a photographer based in New York and London who agreed to speak on the condition that only her first name was used. Although Olivia has been a longtime member of Killing Kittens, the female-focused sex party club that hosted the ball, this was the first time she and her husband had traveled abroad to attend an event. They didn’t meet another couple they were interested in, but the party still had the intended effect on their sex life. “We just watched and then enjoyed our own fun afterward, with the memories,” Olivia said.
According to the Killing Kittens founder Emma Sayle, approximately 60 to 70 percent of the party guests flew in from abroad, paying 500 pounds (around $630) per couple to explore their turn-ons. (A Killing Kittens membership is free to all female and nonbinary people, though a “verification fee” of 20 pounds, or around $26, is required to complete the sign-up process, book tickets and gain access to community chats. Men can join as guest members, allowing them to attend parties as the plus-one of a full member or book tickets to singles’ events.)
“We’ve always had a very international crowd,” said Ms. Sayle, adding that Killing Kittens members travel to Europe from as far away as the Western United States and Australia to attend parties in French châteaus and English country manors.
After the connection-starved pandemic era, the tourism industry embraced sexual wellness as a component of the wellness trend (now estimated to be worth globally more than $651 billion, according to the Global Wellness Institute), with workshops, couples retreats and doctor-led programs.
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