I'm an American expat living in Mexico. Here are the biggest cultural differences between the 2 countries.

13.08.2024 - 14:12 / insider.com

When my husband and I decided to retire, we devised a plan. We wanted to rent out our home in California and visit the UNESCO World Heritage city of Guanajuato.

We planned on staying in the city for just six months, but 20 years later, we now live in Mexico as expats part time.

Even though my husband and I have been living in Mexico part time for two decades years, I'm still surprised at how different the culture is compared to the American culture I have lived in all my life.

The biggest cultural differences are always in the way we communicate.

I found Americans to be very direct. In Mexico, however, if I speak bluntly and to the point, it can be misinterpreted as rude and offensive since it clashes with a more diplomatic communication style. The priority, as in other Latin countries, is to preserve harmony.

To avoid conflict or confrontation, the Mexicans I met rarely say "no" directly but rather speak in a roundabout way to convey their message. If asked a "yes" or "no" question, they might meander around inconclusively before reaching a vague answer like: "Let me think about it."

For example, in my yoga class, one member coordinates a monthly breakfast. A few weeks ago, I chuckled when I read the message she wrote to the group. She took 160 words to basically say, "We need to decide where to have breakfast this month."

It's different from my minimalist English style.

As an American, I have noticed some Mexicans have a casual attitude toward time, which can be frustrating.

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Recently, for example, I had an appointment with the director of a nonprofit to discuss updating the agency's newsletter. Before arriving at her office, I was already flustered because her directions had been ambiguous — at best — and in Guanajuato's nonlinear streets, house numbers aren't consecutive.

When I finally arrived, her staff told me she was out of the office and would be back ahorita, which means "soonish."

Instead of recognizing that she was late only by my definition, not hers, I started to feel unimportant and ignored. When she showed up half an hour later, I felt less confident in my Spanish. While I'm fluent in the language, my conversational ease still fluctuates depending on different circumstances, and that day, it wasn't as strong as usual. I left feeling very deflated.

My takeaway is not to take lateness personally in Mexico.

TheMexicans I met like to tease each other, give friends cheesy nicknames, and make jokes about things that in the US would be inappropriate.

For example, at a concert I attended, one of the musicians referred to another as gordito, meaning plump. I can't imagine a performer joking about someone's weight in the US — and never in front of an audience.

In Guanajuato —