I got remarried, and I'm raising 3 boys in a blended family. Kid-free travel helps us bond as a couple.
28.04.2024 - 23:51
/ insider.com
Last Christmas, my youngest son got me a "Wonder Mom" coffee mug from his school's holiday fair. It's red and blue with yellow stars and makes me smile whenever I see it in the cupboard. While I appreciate the sweet gesture, the gift didn't come with any superpowers. If it did, they would come in handy on school days. Allow me to explain.
My husband and I are raising a blended family with three boys — 8, 13, and 15 — who each go to a different school with slightly different start times. We have one car, so ensuring they arrive before the last bell rings requires Swiss time-keeping precision.
To beat the clock, I get up at 6:30 a.m. and head downstairs to cook breakfast for the five of us while my husband takes care of waking up the kids. Most mornings, I make a few variations of breakfast because we have a mix of picky eaters and food allergies to accommodate, and I want to make sure they have something healthy-ish in their stomachs before leaving. There are medications and vitamins to remember, school IDs and water bottles to pack, and the dog needs to be fed, too.
Once the boys are off, my husband leaves for work, and I get started on my to-dos from the home office. After school, there are pickups, extracurricular activities, dinner, and bedtimes to juggle. My husband and I finally take off for the night around 9:30 p.m., assuming there isn't any last-minute laundry to do.
We aren't the only ones with a schedule like this — to say nothing of dealing with work, financial and other pressures — which is why it makes sense that parental burnout is so high .
A 2023 study by the American Psychological Association found that parents of children under 18 reported a significant increase in stress levels compared to pre-pandemic times. To be exact, 33% of parents now rate their stress between 8 and 10 on a 10-point scale, a 9% increase since 2019.
The APA also looked at the impact of parental burnout and recommended various strategies to "enhance resilience in parenting" such as going on vacations without the children or simply taking "microbreaks" throughout the day. This can be as simple as listening to a guided meditation in the car after running an errand.
While the microbreaks idea was a new one that I might try, my husband and I were already well-acquainted with the relationship-strengthening remedy of getting away sans kids. It makes me a better mom, too. Here's what I mean.
Since my husband and I blended our households last year, we've been intentional about doing activities and outings with all three of the boys to create family memories and build some lifelong bonds.
So far, we've gone on some fun ones, including a long weekend in Colorado Springs for our wedding with the boys